Bittersweet Farewell

To a genealogist cousin who gave me the past, and with it, a better future.

I write about grief each week here on Good Grief because grief is a part of life.

The more I allocate time to feel it, the less it threatens to overwhelm me.

Today, my grief is fresh.

Occasioned by learning yesterday that my mom’s first cousin died after a tough bout with cancer. I hadn’t known she was sick—she was a very private person and my mom’s sister didn’t tell me until after she’d passed.

The news saddened me deeply.

Death makes me sad. Lovely people facing tough bouts with cancer makes me sad. Imagining the sorrow and loss of her husband and children, her brother, and my aunt makes me sad.

Unlike my dad’s sprawling family, my mom’s klan is tiny and ever dwindling. This makes me extra sad.

What doesn’t make me sad is thinking back on my memories of this cousin and all she gave me.

I didn’t know Nancy well. She lived in southern California and my fa…