I Feel Great

And it scares the sh!t out of me.

My poor readers. First you have to listen to me share the grief of my life. And now you have to listen to me freak out about feeling good.

I’m sorry.

I seek peace and tranquility. Only to find feeling it makes me extremely insecure.

Cuz it ain’t gonna last.

I know this. We ALL know this. I suspect I am not the only one afraid of peace and tranquility.

I just haven’t felt it in so long I forgot about the insecurity that comes from feeling safe.

Have I made myself feel unsafe to avoid how terrified it makes me to feel safe?

I am stronger than I have been in YEARS. Which should be cause for celebration. Except it makes me feel like I suddenly need to do all the things I’ve been putting off until I felt stronger.

Which is A LOT OF THINGS.

Safety Brings Enormous Responsibility

Believe it or not, I’ve cut myself a lot of slack these past several years. Because …